I just sneezed and my sister upstairs posted “bless you” on my facebook wall.
white son in any movie: no dad, I'm throwing away ~yours~
Ugh how do you expect me to decide what college to attend or who I want to marry or what I want to do for the rest of my life
I CAN’T EVEN DECIDE WHERE TO PUT A STICKER BECAUSE PEELING OFF THE BACK AND HAVING IT STAY IN ONE PLACE FOREVER IS TOO BIG OF A COMMITMENT FOR ME TO LIVE WITH
me: thinks about mistake every night for the next 7 years
Right so im walking home and I see this guy rolling a cigarette under a streetlamp and when he clicked his lighter THE FUCKING STREETLIGHT WENT OUT
I stopped in my tracks and stared at this guy who looks up at me then to his lighter and hes as surprised as me then he takes his thumb off the trigger and THE STREETLIGHT TURNS BACK ON
HE GAVE THE MOST SURPRISED LOOK OF ANYONE EVER AND THEN SHOUTED “LATER MUGGLES” AND FUCKING RAN OFF
AM I DREAMING
playing hard to get (away from)



